The Sparts

national | miscellaneous | news report Sunday March 23, 2003 17:32 by Shock and Awe

- Tips to get them away from you

If a Spart ever come up to you just say a few of these things and he will soon make his excuses and leave you alone.

1. Financial irregularties in their New York branch which saw a few explusions.

2. A split in their French section back at the time of the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan after they objected being sent over to fight for the Russians. The USSR didn't want them there anyway.

3. Their defence of paedophilea. They say that to have an age of consent law is on a par to having homosexuality banned. They say it is pandering to bourgeois morality. They even went as far as to defend the American Man-Boy Love Association. Rumour has it that the reason for this position is because of a member of theirs in New Zealand was prosecuted for chilld abuse.

4. The suicide of a leading member of theirs in East Germany following the fall of the Berlin Wall.

5. They are rumoured to be CIA backed. Where else do the get all their money? Although not too many believe this as they are not doing a great job in dividing the left.