"Peak Oil" = "Peak Bread"

international | environment | opinion/analysis

Sunday September 16, 2007 15:43

by Fu Manchu

Each year the average Italian eats 28kg of Pasta which is derived from wheat. This week Italians were urged to go on "pasta strike" to protest rising wheat costs which has seen their daily staple increase 20% in the last year. Elsewhere in Europe shoppers and eaters have found the price of bread rising in similar fashion. For their part farmers blame changing climatic conditions which increase voracious vermin (who doth eat the wheat) and stricter measures by governments to combat climate related problems (the hot sun doth prepare the land for fires thus seeing its chaff & voles burnt increases forest fires) and of course the war on Iraq (for increasing the cost of all oil including red diesel). All pretty convincing reasoning in a passing casual interest slice of toast sort of way.

by 2007 man will have harnessed the power of the Gerbil

Now try adding this reason :- the increased hectarage of land dedicated to the cultivation & development of biofuel alternatives to hydrocarbon resources has meant less land for bread and pasta. Or to hone it a bit, the increasing profit margin concerns of land whether to be used for R&D biotech or alternative ventures means ever less land for a the cheap baguette or spaghetti tree, and the farmers are taking their revenge for years of nastiness under a new Green government.

'Tis your car & sparkling future or your bread. You decide. Really you probably are already, unless you don't have a car, never had a car, and filled brimful with aching rage & marginalised resentment. All for want of a bread roll.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biofuels#Rising_food_price...ebate

I can't do much with you if that's how you feel to be honest, but if you get good at the altruism & quit felling ripped offf over impending armageddon you could join the Campaign for voluntary human extinction - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voluntary_Human_Extinction...ement they've just done their translations and hoping to recruit globally. http://www.vhemt.org/

Horses were great though. You could feed them bread rolls and then you could turn them into glue. But as was confidently predicted by some Victorian in the pay of Ford and Co, if we had continued breeding horses we'd be up to our necks in manure by now. Still, would have sped up the biofuel thing and we could have eaten horses instead of bread in the meantime.

Great news for Green Party fans and those whose future backs Gummy Gormley. British scientists have developed a non-stick chewing gum which they will save hundreds of millions of pounds of cleaning every year. The great new alternative to the byproduct of the traditional oil industry which is "regular gum" will take advantage of ground breaking new biofuel and alternative adjusted wheat propagation techniques.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/6993719.stm

I've done my best with very bad material. all the same. nonetheless.